Results

Here we are, three and a half months after starting this journey, two weeks after the egg retrieval, and nine days after our first embryo transfer.  Today, we had our blood pregnancy test.  We waited and waited for the call that finally came around 4:45pm.

The results....not good.  My HCG (pregnancy hormone) was only 6.  At this point, a successful pregnancy would result in an HCG level of at least 50.  Our nurse called this a "gray area."  It's not negative, but it's no where near the level of a viable pregnancy.  I will have a second blood pregnancy test on Wednesday, just to confirm our failed IVF cycle.  We had two viable embryos, and we don't even get to have one.

We had so many people send us positive thoughts and so many people prayed for us.  I can't believe how many views our blog has had and how many people have reached out to us.  We are so appreciative of everyone's words of encouragement, support, and concern.  I wish we had better news to share.

Instead, we are in a complete state of devastation.  We put everything we have--emotionally, physically, and financially--into this.  I did everything I was supposed to do--acupuncture, the Fertility diet, vitamin D supplements, prescription prenatal vitamins, multiple injections for several weeks, took a lengthy list of oral medications, was on bed rest after the embryo transfer--and none of it mattered.

I know that we are already luckier than some couples because we have Chase, our son who turns two years old in four days.  But, I have to say that it doesn't take away the heartache that we are experiencing.  It doesn't remove the desire we have to grow and expand our family.  But, we have to move on, we have to put on a happy face, for Chase.  He is what matters most.  I don't know if this is the end of our journey.  We don't want to give up, but we don't know what other options we realistically have.  I never wanted an "only child," but I am so grateful for the only child we have.